Tag Archives: self help

art, creativity, inspiration, inspirational, self help, Uncategorized, value

What do you value?

What do you value? I’ve asked that question to many aspiring artists and invariably get answers that have nothing to do with value itself.

Women more than men se their kids as their greatest value. I get that. Family comes first, but when I ask what THEIR most important value is, I get blank stares.

What would you do for yourself?

People live through other people and their values. We have forgotten to put ourselves first. Only when you put yourself first will you have a chance to value yourSELF and find out what really matters.

So many times I hear people wanting to make art, but there is always a “but” in the sentence. “When things slow down,” by such and such date. “When the kids are in college.” The most popular: “When I have some extra time.”

You know they won’t pick up a paintbrush or marker any time soon. It is sad, but that’s their choice.

What is important for your own evolution?

Mine is definitely creativity and also spirituality. Without spirituality there is no real depth.

Along those lines, I create every day. There is no tomorrow or compromises. Part of me always try to find excuses, like “I’m too tired,” “I’m not inspired,” “I’m not really any good at my art.”

Those are all bs excuses.

Whatever your dream or inclination, go for it. TODAY!! Start now.

On my work table, an unfinished soft bird sculpture, and a somewhat finished abstract painting.

The Dancer

Starting on February 4, I’m offering a free 5-day virtual art retreat with meditation and art creating (whatever your medium.)

If you want to join, please add your email to the list. I will send out the particulars at the end of January. A 5-day creative self-love boost! You can read all about it HERE.

You can sign up for the email HERE.

Happy New Year, and happy creation.

Love, Maria

P,S. I have fresh ready-to-use art journals in my etsy shop today. EarthandFaery.

art, artist, creativity, perfection, self help

Perfectionism kills creativity

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Perfectionism kills creativity and how do you change in the direction of deeper creativity?

Do you compare yourself to the perfection of nature?  What do you compare yourself to?

perfection
perfection

As an artist, perfectionism stifles all expression.  Maybe it’s ok in the very last layer of a realistic painting, but I don’t know since I don’t paint realism. I have suffered from perfectionism from time to time. It shows up as:

That didn’t turn out very good

Is this any good?

I can never get it right

Those statements might not seem like an angle of perfectionism, but when we doubt what we made we have a picture of what it SHOULD look like, and it’s never good enough.  It comes down to comparison to some kind of ideal or living up to someone else’s expectations.

Maybe someone’s voice is running a commentary in your head?

Maybe our parents expected us to be perfect in every way. What does that have to do with art? It has everything to do with whatever task you attempt, be it art, writing, speaking, teaching, accounting. Basically, in every area of life. The way we look, the way we work.

How do you escape this tyranny of perfectionism?

First, you have to realize it’s present, and a pain in the ass. Not everyone notices or perfectionism is so embedded in the “norm” that it’s inconceivable to change.

As an artist, it’s important to let loose and try something completely different from your current mode of expression.

Become three years old again. Slap some paint on a poster board.

Make ugly abstract art. Muddy the colors. Paint big.

Use tools you don’t normally use.

As you explore this, something inside has to give. The perfectionist will raise a big stink, but allow it to and paint anyway. Just go nuts!

Do this with everything. Don’t mop the floor every day even if it makes you feel uncomfortable. Don’t pick up the clothes. Don’t obsessively clean the kitchen counter. Let some dishes sit around in the sink.

Allow the inner wisdom to show you that life won’t fall apart if you get a bit “sloppy.”

wisdom
wisdom versus perfectionism

It is a challenge, but to truly change, you have to face the discomfort and get to the other side.

To become a life artist we have to face the difficult things that hold us back.

Paint anyway.  Show up, be daring.

Allow the emotions to flow. There might be rage under the perfectionism, but rage is good fuel for art! 🙂

Then, underneath the rage there might be other stuffed emotions. And then there is peace. And it’s ok if there are dishes in the sink for the time being. Expressing your creativity is more important.

Maybe you pick up a new style… YOUR style.

xo

Maria

P.S. If you’d like to get my art newsletter, please sign up HERE.

ecourse, inspirational, life, motivational, self help, transformation

Hating self-help questionnaires.

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Why would I write such a title, “hating self-help questionnaires?” If you’re reading this you have read and filled out many worksheets, or skipped them altogether.  I know you all hate them.  I know I do.  They are boring, a thorn in the side.

I’m working on an e-course that is about finding your inner true north using your intuition. It’s about making choices that are healthy for you. The question is, do we want health?  I mean health in every sense of the word.

We do and we don’t. The side of us that wants a healthy balanced life answers the deep  inquiries and works on the issues or try to. The other side flings the dang workbook across the room as the inner rebel rears up, refusing to reply to any  questions that might overturn the status quo. Heaven forbid we would change!  We don’t need to change, right?

What is the wall that comes up and says “stop,  do not move any further.” It has many names but the most common name is resistance. If you dig deeper you come across fear and all sorts of unworthiness issues hiding behind resistance.

Most people avoid those uncomfortable feelings at all cost.

Questions are what start us on the road to inner discovery.

Writing on a workbook right now, I’m struggling with how to make the questions less confronting and more acceptable.  What would make people look forward to going in deep and releasing the beliefs and trapped feelings within?  What would make them actually finish the course and work through the issues?

There is a need for structured questions for sure, but what if another person asked them?  No writing down answers, just discussing what comes up and looking for “aha” moments. A lively interaction between two people who trust each other  might make going through a workbook desirable.

A bottle of wine, some yummy snacks, and a deep discussion based on the workbook could very well be the answer!

I don’t know how many times I have read a great self-help book, but when I reached the questions I  skimmed over them or ignored them altogether.

How many self-help books have your bought and never finished?

We like the IDEA of changing ourselves for the better, but when it comes to the actual work we often balk.

Workbooks and questionnaires might be out of style in this fast-paced world.

What if it became a more dynamic process?

I believe it’s more important to be open to the signs around us, accept that the world mirrors our states of mind. If there is a traffic jam maybe it’s a sign to slow down. If we keep making the same mistakes over and over, what belief / feeling INSIDE of us makes that happen?  If we can be aware and open in the now, all our shi*t will be revealed, and then we have to choose whether to work with it, or keep living in denial.  Denial will inevitably create more difficulties.

Some people do not believe in a world that mirrors your inner stuff, but if you do, it can be a hugely beneficial “school room.”

Life can be smoother, easier to accept with its ups and downs if we agree to work on our shi*t.  As you create peace with yourself, you create peace in the world.

My suggestion is, have a party with one or two friends, off-line or online, who are on the same path, or working on the same workbook. Get the stuff behind the resistance out into the open and decide to deal with it.

That is one way past resistance and into a life of fresh perception.