Tag Archives: artist

Doormat syndrome.

Doormat syndrome, have you suffered from that as a woman (or man?)

I have at times. I had two relationships that were “their way or no way.” I’d say it’s common to submit to others to keep the peace.

doormat
doormat

For a time, anyone was welcome to step on me and make me do their bidding, cause it was “nice” to help others, no matter what.

No more.

Yesterday, I had two conversations with women having trouble standing up for themselves, as if saying “no” is not nice or not supportive. We as women are raised to be supportive and submissive. I say, to heck with that!!!

There is a limit to what is expected of us. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it! If you don’t WANT to do something, don’t do it. If someone is clingy, hogs your time, drains your energy, just excuse yourself and remove yourself from that person. Know your limits! That is SELF RESPECT. You have the right to stand in your power, always.

Someone might snigger at those words, but the longer we stay in a submissive stance to others, the less we can pursue our dreams because someone will always step on them. That is part of the scenario of being a doormat. Make better choices.

  • It’s okay to be your own person.
  • It’s okay to have dreams.
  • It’s okay to be an artist if you want to.
  • It’s okay to make others mad if you are protecting what you know is right for you.
  • It’s okay to have time for yourself.
  • It’s okay to be a role model for strength.

I have lost friends over that last statement, and I don’t have to be RIGHT, but I can choose what works in my life and ditch the rest.

So many women I know put everyone else’s dreams and desires before their own. When are you going to realize your own strengths if you deny your power as a person? Say you fall down dead and realize you did nothing to pursue what fired up your soul.  That would totally suck in my opinion.

To be an artist matters. Your voice matters, your art matters. Your expression in the world is very important so if you have something to say or paint, do it.  As they say, life is short.

The greatest excuse I hear is: I have to be there for my children.  Yes, of course you do, but you also have a responsibility to yourself.

Make your children badass and confident as you grow yourself stronger.

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Children who are not doormats

Allow yourself to choose YOU.  Your children will learn from you. Do you want them to become doormats? I didn’t think so.

Maybe you wonder why I post many motivational posts instead of artist stuff?  Being an artist requires becoming the whole you. I’m working on that, and my art expression is a journey that changes all the time.  Art has helped me to be strong.  So maybe it’s better to inspire people to be strong than add a bunch of art how-tos. I decided I can do both. 🙂

So can you! Dive in and be the GREAT You now. If people stand in your way, you deserve better. Work around them or get rid of them.

You are enough!

With lots of love,

Maria

P.S. Sidebar note. I have a sale going on for my art journal how-to e-course. ONLY $15 until October 26. CLICK THIS LINK. Create something today! Get involved.

New art in my etsy shop.

Buddha abstract
New art in my etsy shop

Too little time

Yes, there is too little time to attend to all the art e-courses I signed up for this spring. Some of them run weekly for a long time, and others are short-term courses.  How do you manage those classes?

I love them all, but I don’t feel good when I fall behind and let some of the classes slip because other things, like “life” get in the way of my fun.

What makes it so fun is that I can explore other artists’ visions of what they practice and how they see life. It’s a great ongoing exploration.

Some of courses are waaay too long and then I have to figure out which classes to pursue of the offering. As with anything else, we have preferences.

Art is never a BAD practice even if the subject does not thrill you. It is always a learning experience and a new way of looking at things.

If time is short, make a decision to paint X amount of minutes every day and stick with it. That is the answer to “too little time.” It’s amazing how much you can accomplish in as little as 15 minutes a day.

I enjoy that there are e-courses available about all styles of art, and artists.  I don’t even have to leave my house.

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Abstract exploration.

This was inspired by some abstract tutorial I found online.

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Flower mandala.

I had seen flower mandalas online, and also classes on painting mandalas, so I wanted to try my own.  My backyard does not have an abundance of flowers but these came from there. It was fun to make.

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Awful still lives I painted in one course.

I definitely don’t like painting still lives…

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Silly portrait of myself

I had never tried a self-portrait. I don’t care much for the exercise, but it was challenging.  The things in the background are paint tubes.  I think I mostly used colored pencils for this portrait. My hair is short now.

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Upside down cat.

We were supposed to paint something upside down so I used a picture of my cat with his head upside down, and then collaged a couple of hands below with a fish.

My mom used to say that when cats sleep with their heads upside down it’s going to rain… I haven’t seen any evidence of that, but she lived closer to nature.

What new things are you trying? Are you involved in any art e-courses this spring? I think it’s worth the effort.

Have a great, creative weekend!!

xo

Maria

P.S. You can always try my art journaling tutorial for free if you sign up for my newsletter. 🙂  Click image in the top right hand corner of this page.

Ugly Is Okay!

toadimage

Ugly is in the eye of the beholder, right?  To me, ugly is okay.  I googled free pictures of “ugly” and there were a whole bunch of them, all wildly diverse. Who decides what is ugly anyway? I saw the toad picture and thought of the saying “ugly as a toad,” but truly, he’s kind of cute, warts and all! After all, he is Kermit’s half(?) brother…

Do we judge something as ugly because of the colors or the shape?  Opinions are as diverse as there are people. Then there are clueless people who don’t like anything, but they are not important in this post.

As an artist, I deal with “ugly” every day. Many times I judge my art as ugly, or that the result of a day of painting turned out ugly. However, a friend might come by and totally love the piece.  Who am I to judge??

I think it’s about making art in the face of fear and failure.  We make art because we love it, not so much hoping we are going to outshine Vermeer or Michelangelo.  Still, it can be painful to have your art judged as ugly, or that you hate the result.  What counts is that you showed up at the blank page.

We all start somewhere. The technical skill might be lacking but the essence of the person who made the art shines through.  Especially if it’s not a copy job.  It can be hard to fly in the face of trends. The cuteness factor is hard to compete with if you’re painting mostly in black and gray.

No one paints like you or me or Vermeer.  We are unique and we came here to share our unique gift with the world.  Share the good vibe as they say. 🙂

Artists who keep coming back to making art “has to” share  their unique vibe and it’s a beautiful thing.

The point of this post: don’t compare yourself to others. You will never paint as cute as they do, haha, but your art is important.  If you consider your art “ugly” own it and be proud of your accomplishment.  Someone might come by and fall in love with the piece, and then what are you going to say?

We share at the level we are at.  We might no be a genius like Mozart or Leonardo, but our art is just as important if in a smaller scale. If you touched only one other person, that would be enough.  Then again, as you practice your art, you may dig deep into your inner genius, and then your name will be on a plaque in a museum too. You never know unless you keep on going!

Let’s go paint some ugly pictures! I’m excited. 🙂

xo

Maria

P.S. I have a bunch of short free tutorials and a couple of paid ecourses on my other site.  If interested you can check them out HERE.