Category Archives: fear

Apoxie Sculpt, art, artist, commitment, fear

fear is not your friend

Fear is not your friend unless it warns you to get off the railroad tracks as the train is coming. There are so many levels of fear, and the most insidious one is the fear that stops us from fulfilling our calling (to be artists or other forms of expression.)

I was talking to a friend who said she always wanted to be an artist. I could relate to her as I’ve always felt that way too. Then I felt so grateful that I had at one point decided to commit to the idea with action.

I know I would feel unfulfilled without it, and now, after many years, I think I have come a long way even though there’s no beginning or end.

I was reading this book: Wild Ideas, Creativity From The Inside Out, by Cathy Wild, and I saw this paragraph that so hit home with what I’m saying here.

“If you want to create, you need to become an explorer. An explorer may be an astronaut living in a space station or a pop songwriter attempting to compose an opera or a former welfare recipient heading off to a first day of work. As an explorer, you must want to find out what lies beyond the boundaries of what you already understand and what you already know how to do.”

You can find the book on Amazon HERE. It’s well worth a read.

So, to be an explorer, you have to keep an open mind and be willing to come across resistance, which is inevitable. Have a conversation with it and ask why it has arrived to instigate reluctance to create.

It will likely say: “If you go down that path, you will only encounter trouble that you can’t handle” In other words, it’s spreading fear and tries to tell you you’re inadequate.

As an artist, you’ll come across that every week, or even every day, if you’re serious about commitment and showing up at your work table or easel.

Working a regular job, you come across problems that need to be solved, right? However you solve your problem, you just do it, or you get fired (worst-case scenario.) If we bring some of that determination into getting past the things that stop us from doing something we love, no problem or resistance can stop us.

Then comes a time when you have to grow out of the comfort zone as an artist. The way I deal with that is to try many different things, materials, and styles. It’s like walking through the jungle with a small machete. You don’t know what you see until you come right up to it. Sometimes you say no, this is not for me, and other times, something pushes you to keep going with the new material.

Frustration = fear = learning curve

Make frustration your best friend! When you feel it the strongest, you’re on the verge of a discovery, so keep on going, past the fear. Honor the learning curve! Anything new has to be learned, and there will be many failures, but those are steps to getting to the place where you’re happy with the result.

Whimsical dog made from epoxy clay and paint
whimsical dog
Crystal wand made with oak wood, crystals, and epoxy clay.
Crystal wand

What you see above are items I made with epoxy clay, which for me has been really hard to work with. I really love the durability of the clay and how it dries rock hard and attaches to pretty much anything. I have worked quite a while with it, and had to throw out some things that did not work out at all.

You know it’s a learning curve, so you continue.

Do not stop when the going gets tough

If you stop you’ll never know if you could master the challenge.

If you stop, you’ll beat yourself up for not going to the finish line, no matter how “ugly” the art turned out.

I haven’t mastered the epoxy clay (Apoxie Sculpt,) but I’m working on it, and every item teaches me something. I look at videos on YouTube by people who have mastered the clay, and I go, wow, I want to be that good too. Some day, I will! 🙂

My point is: don’t sabotage your dreams, don’t sell yourself short, give your dream a chance! Please. Commit and start making art. Copying other artists is okay in the beginning.

Lots of love,

Maria

P.S. I have many new items in my etsy shop, Earth and Faery. Some of them are not all perfect, but people seem to like them anyway. 🙂

Apoxie Sculpt, art assemblage, art making, fear, resistance

What is holding you back?

What is holding you back? Fear? Excuses? They are all one and the same, and it sums up to fear. When it comes to creating any kind of art, fear is a constant companion, usually in the shape of resistance.

I wrote a post about resistance and it’s worth a read if you’re not getting anywhere with your art. Lately, I’ve heard a lot of excuses why people don’t create even though they want to at heart.

I suffer from resistance a lot, especially when I’m trying some new art supply or style. Recently, I picked up some tubs of Apoxie Sculpt. (I wrote about it in my last post.) I debated then to put it aside, but I decided to try some more projects with that type of clay. It’s still frustrating to work with, but I have persevered.

Since the clay is pretty expensive, I try to use as many shapes underneath as I can and then cover with a thin layer of clay. It makes it less heavy as well. I bought some styrofoam balls, and to form the body of the birds below, I used one large for the body and one small for the head. I used popsicle sticks, broken in half, to form tails and necks. Here are the end results, a couple of circus birds on “wheels.”

They were fun to make. I used blocks of wood that I covered with papers and wooden wheels. The legs are 19 gauge steel wire. It was a challenge to make these birds, but why not stretch oneself, despite the resistance?

If fear is holding you back…

The only way to overcome it is to do the thing you’re afraid of. Otherwise, it will haunt you. I know this well from previous experiences.

I have found I like making art assemblages. I had to use a drill for simple holes, and it felt awkward and new, but maybe it’s the beginning of new fields of experience.

Don’t let fear hold you back if you want to renew your life, your experiences. It’s not just artistic expression. It’s so easy to stay in the comfort zone, but life gets boring in the long run.

To mix things up, even more, I prepped a bunch of canvases for later use. I love to add mixed media as I go, and I even finished one project when I saw a robust lady emerge from the layers.

A mixed media art project with layers of paper and paint.
Is fear holding you back?

I also made some of my usual objects for sale in my Etsy shop these last few days.

I love the little mosaic Virgin Mary shrines, and now I have used my last Altoids tin!

It’s time to be brave! Make the time to be an explorer, kick the excuses to the curb. Every day is another opportunity for fun creativity.

Lots of love and wishes for happy creativity!

Maria

change, dream, fear, life, motivational

Your dream is real

Your dream is real, yet we do everything BUT listen to and acknowledge our dream.

Everyone has a longing for something. For me, it was art, making art in many forms. I have made a lot of art over the years, but there have been many detours along the way.

The problem is DOING, and major lack of listening.

To really get beyond all the conditioning we carry from as far back as our childhood, we have to stop everything and listen within.

The dream might be a small flicker of light or a great big monster trying to get your attention.

Our conditioning is based on doing, of accomplishing, of getting ahead, of making money, of being practical. Listen to the voice of reason.

Problem is, life becomes an uphill struggle, a chore, an anti-dream. We push through, we are super women or men, and we hate getting up in the morning (if we allow ourselves to think about it.) Maybe all doors to thinking and feeling are closed. Easier that way.

But it isn’t. If we don’t listen within, there comes a crisis where we’re faced with our blocks and short-comings. Then there is no way forward except for letting go and facing the uncomfortable voice of truth.

Why do we allow the crisis to happen? It’s the illusion of all is fine, “I’ve got this,” “I’m okay,” while quietly suffering inside or not acknowledging our feelings. Sticking the head in the sand is not the answer.

I have come to a cross-roads and I’m willing to look at it. It’s not the first time in my life that change has come knocking on my door.

There has been a time of major blah in my life lately. I go through the motions but the mojo isn’t there.

Well okay, I recognize the signs of change.

Instead of stubbornly pushing through, which is my most common way of performing, I have learned to drop it all and really look into the gaping maw of the unknown.

Either I can be excited or full of fear.

Why hang on to the old? It’s like having a favorite sweater you don’t want to let go of even if it’s full of holes and paint spatters.

I might not know what is next, but so far, life has worked out just fine, so why would I need to fear the future?

I’m not afraid but I don’t like change. It’s so much easier to stay in my comfort zone than to take a look at my inner far-from-perfect patterns. It can be outright disgusting. But I have to acknowledge the truth if I’m to free myself from conditioning.

Self love, self-compassion are important as we change. They help when we’re facing the “beast” that does NOT want to examine anything. It says, “I don’t want any inner growth.”

But do you want to stay in the stale sameness? I know I don’t, so I bite the bullet. Allowing the inner to come out is a new way of living.

Let’s live from the inside out! Facing the “beast” can become a healthy habit, just like exercising and eating right. I’d rather support my path to renewal than support the same ole, same ole.

Behind all of the stuff we carry, there is LIGHT and it’s always available. 🙂

Yet, listen up. Your dream wants to manifest in 3D so let’s make room for it.

I did have some fun. I made a how-to art journal video this week. Check it out.

mermaid

Have a great weekend! Let that creativity flow.

xo

Maria

art, excuses, fear, intuition, motivational, self help, stuck

The dog ate my motivation

1 Comment

The dog ate my motivation. Good excuse, right?

We get inventive when it comes to excuses to avoid that which we REALLY want to do if we weren’t so scared.

A lack of motivation usually stems from fear. Sometimes we realize that what we have been doing isn’t working so we lose motivation.

I have been sensing a shift lately. I don’t lack discipline (but strong discipline can sometimes work against me.) A feeling that things weren’t working out has bogged me down in the last week or so.

I felt cornered. I made this art journal spread to express my feelings.

art journaling

Then I realized that I have to go back to the moment, to let my intuition guide me. So often I “push through” which is not guided by my intuition, but by my force of will.

I’m stubborn and I want things to happen NOW, not later or on a universal timeline.  As frustration sets in I have to surrender, and then I find myself back on track, motivated to step forward again.

Our body is a great indicator whether we’re “pushing” or allowing. How does if feel? Like rolling a rock up a mountain?

Water flows easily around obstacles. Be like water.

Listen to that inner urge, the subtle force that propels us forward. The turtle wins the race…

If you don’t feel motivated what can you do? If you want to make art, set aside a no-excuse time to do it and stick with it! Everyone can find 15 minutes a day.

Put your art supplies out on a table or counter somewhere. They are a reminder of what you want to do.

Find creative ways around chores and children or involve the tots in art making with you. You might inspire a future artist.

Watch art how-to videos on YouTube. I have a channel with lots of INSPIRING VIDEOS.

To get on track we have to engage with the things that inspire fear. Art is easy as you can’t go wrong! Look at is as exploration.  I’m only addressing art here, but if you have a different dream, what is holding you back?

Cultivate discipline but don’t let it consume you and your inner sense of what is right. There is a balance to everything.

Trust the sensations in your body. They are never wrong.

When you feel inspired, act! Don’t put it off.

When you don’t feel inspired, listen within and trust that everything is okay.

Make a habit of creating some art every day. It bears repeating. Make friends with your art materials. Sometimes unknown materials can be scary. Remember, your art is never wrong. Accept the ugly with the beautiful and keep going.

Stop making excuses, period. Stand “naked” with the pain of frustration and indecision. Allow the stuckness until you feel that inner “go” again.

Make some bold moves.

Don’t blame the dog! 🙂

xo

Maria

P.S. I have some inspiring and affordable e-courses if you’re looking for tutorials. CLICK HERE. 

 

art, dream, excuses, fear, motivational, writing

Fear holding you back?

Fear holding you back from pursuing your dreams? It happens to all of us, at least to those who accept they have a dream.

fear
fear

It was not random that we came into this world, and as we grew we showed certain talents and skills. Some were good at math, some at the gym, some showed artistic talent.

When I was a kid I knew I had a talent for words.  I loved expressive art, but it developed later. Words have always flowed easily for me so I ended up becoming a writer until that interest kind of petered out. But as they say, a writer is always a writer.

I have to say visual art is a tougher dream, but I love it passionately. There are so many ways to express oneself. Where to start?

art palette
art palette

There are two things I want to mention:

You often look at other people’s art and then try to copy it because you like it.

Or you encounter massive resistance.

That is the fear / ego kicking in saying lots of nasty stuff about your lack of talent and sense of color or whatever. Your fear will find something wrong with you no matter what. I wrote a blog post about resistance a while back: Who is in charge…

If you have no clue where to start, copy other people’s art that you love. As you get more sure about your art supplies and what they can do, you start to experiment with what you have learned.

As you grow bolder with each experiment, you start to feel more secure, but the fear is always lurking in the background.

Do the art processes that feel good to you. If it doesn’t feel right, try something else. There are so many techniques and tools it can be bewildering.  The only way through is to keep trying and doing.

If you hit a block, know that things are about to change. It usually shows up before a major breakthrough, but you can get stuck in procrastination. That is a sneaky way for the inner critic to attack you when you’re down. I wrote a post about that, available here: Procrastination is an ugly beast…

There are no shortcuts of easy fixes. Each artistic journey is so individual it’s hard to give advice that fits everyone.

One thing is for sure: A dream is worth pursuing, and the way to do it is to give it some time every day. Create a discipline for your dream. If it is important enough you will do it.

Is it?

Well then, what are you waiting for?

When all is said and done we have to do things that light us up, otherwise, what is the point?

Have a great creative week!

xo

Maria

P.S. I have some handmade art journals in my etsy shop that might help to get you started. CLICK HERE to check out my offerings.

creativity, doubt, fear, inspirational, passion, process

Doubt is what holds us back.

I have no doubt that doubt holds us back from achieving our dreams.

cloud-705729__180
doubt and fear

Dreams can be elusive, and you might have a vague idea of what your dream is about. If you have an inkling that is GOOD! So many people don’t have any idea of what their dream or passion is.

Achieving a dream can be fraught with doubt and other pitfalls, but the easy part is to JUST START where you are now.  Say you want to be an accomplished painter and you know you feel great when you paint, but something holds you back.

Fear create doubts. “I’m not good enough.”  “I can’t paint well enough.” “I never went to art school so I can’t be a painter.” “People don’t approve.”

Sounds familiar?  But who cares?  When you start something, you might not have any idea of where you’re going, but buy some art supplies that appeal to you. (Most likely, you already have some dusty stuff hidden in the closet.) Dust that stuff off and bring it back out.

start-1093914__180
Despite the doubt, just start.

Once you have started and made a commitment to pursue your desire to become a painter, you will find that the next step on the journey will reveal itself.  It’s as if starting sets off some kind of unseen magic.

You will make some ugly art and you will make some great art, and the PROCESS is what makes things interesting.  Everything you do will teach you to take the next step. Art, by the way, is an endless exploration so even if you are a painter for 60 years, you still have more to explore. That is a great thing!

Other passions might not have that longevity factor.

You will be working on yourself as you follow your passion.  Everything we dare to do helps us to discover new depths and gifts within ourselves. That is another gift that happens when we dare to step out of our comfort zone and try something new.

By all means, take some painting courses to learn technique, but know that the true creativity is inside of you. Don’t become a copy cat. Be brave enough to forge your own path even if there is lots of resistance. That might never go away, but you can make friends with it and DO IT ANYWAY.

Resistance meets me every morning in the studio, but what the heck is new with that?  Nada.  Old record of fear keeps playing in my mind, but action takes me beyond that and into the space where magic happens, or not. I still gain experience that is valuable.

How to find your passion if you don’t know what it is.

Think back to when you were a kid. What did you do then that you enjoyed? I enjoyed crafts (paperdolls,) reading, and the outdoors.  Art making has traveled like a red thread through my life.

Think of some job you liked or had a knack for. It might have been a summer job when you were young.

What do you have a knack for?  Writing? Numbers? Decorating?  What do your friends ask you to help them with if anything?  Do they often say, “You’re so good at this.”

If you like more internal things like reading, maybe you can try writing a book.  What if you like intuition and meditation, all internal experiences? Maybe you can teach that to people.  What if you love to cook? Maybe you can specialize in some type of cooking and write a cook book?

The possibilities are endless.

Maybe you like to speak, to lead, to teach. The online world is filled with endless possibility to make your mark and help many people.

Find your passion, START doing it.  Take one step at a time, and when hurdles show up (as they will,) deal with them one at a time. You may have to do some internal work to get past feelings to inadequacy but in the long run, you will stand VICTORIOUS, and who knows, your paintings might be worth millions (once you’re dead, haha.) It’s all in the process, baby.

Kick the doubt to the curb and tell it stay the hell away!

xo

Maria

P.S. I have an art and intuition ecourse coming up. Art as Oracle 2 starts on June 7. You can read all about it HERE.