Doormat syndrome, have you suffered from that as a woman (or man?)
I have at times. I had two relationships that were “their way or no way.” I’d say it’s common to submit to others to keep the peace.
For a time, anyone was welcome to step on me and make me do their bidding, cause it was “nice” to help others, no matter what.
Yesterday, I had two conversations with women having trouble standing up for themselves, as if saying “no” is not nice or not supportive. We as women are raised to be supportive and submissive. I say, to heck with that!!!
There is a limit to what is expected of us. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it! If you don’t WANT to do something, don’t do it. If someone is clingy, hogs your time, drains your energy, just excuse yourself and remove yourself from that person. Know your limits! That is SELF RESPECT. You have the right to stand in your power, always.
Someone might snigger at those words, but the longer we stay in a submissive stance to others, the less we can pursue our dreams because someone will always step on them. That is part of the scenario of being a doormat. Make better choices.
- It’s okay to be your own person.
- It’s okay to have dreams.
- It’s okay to be an artist if you want to.
- It’s okay to make others mad if you are protecting what you know is right for you.
- It’s okay to have time for yourself.
- It’s okay to be a role model for strength.
I have lost friends over that last statement, and I don’t have to be RIGHT, but I can choose what works in my life and ditch the rest.
So many women I know put everyone else’s dreams and desires before their own. When are you going to realize your own strengths if you deny your power as a person? Say you fall down dead and realize you did nothing to pursue what fired up your soul. That would totally suck in my opinion.
To be an artist matters. Your voice matters, your art matters. Your expression in the world is very important so if you have something to say or paint, do it. As they say, life is short.
The greatest excuse I hear is: I have to be there for my children. Yes, of course you do, but you also have a responsibility to yourself.
Make your children badass and confident as you grow yourself stronger.
Allow yourself to choose YOU. Your children will learn from you. Do you want them to become doormats? I didn’t think so.
Maybe you wonder why I post many motivational posts instead of artist stuff? Being an artist requires becoming the whole you. I’m working on that, and my art expression is a journey that changes all the time. Art has helped me to be strong. So maybe it’s better to inspire people to be strong than add a bunch of art how-tos. I decided I can do both. 🙂
So can you! Dive in and be the GREAT You now. If people stand in your way, you deserve better. Work around them or get rid of them.
You are enough!
With lots of love,
P.S. Sidebar note. I have a sale going on for my art journal how-to e-course. ONLY $15 until October 26. CLICK THIS LINK. Create something today! Get involved.
New art in my etsy shop.